A Merry Payday Christmas

by Hoxton

supported by
Desucrate
Desucrate thumbnail
Desucrate Better than actual Christmas songs 10/10 Favorite track: Deck the Safe House.
Brian Cagle
Brian Cagle thumbnail
Brian Cagle The Best Christmas Video Game album every released. Definite must for a fan of the game and christmas. So great you need to buy it twice, here and on Steam/ Favorite track: A Heist Not Attempted Before.
Melissa M.
Melissa M. thumbnail
Melissa M. This is the only Christmas album that I've listened more than once, and I love it.
Even on summer. Favorite track: A Heist Not Attempted Before.
kravlin
kravlin thumbnail
kravlin Six actually original Christmas songs with a heist theme? Yes Please. Plus, Hoxton actually has a decent singing voice. Lets see how long it takes my family to notice these in the Christmas rotation. Favorite track: A Heist Not Attempted Before.
Brandon M
Brandon M thumbnail
Brandon M Christmas may be over, but I can still listen to this album and enjoy every second. The music is great, as always with Simon Viklund, and the songs are written really well. Still gives me a warm Christmas-y feeling everytime I listen. Favorite track: Deck the Safe House.
Auburok
Auburok thumbnail
Auburok A Christmas album I can listen to even when it's the middle of June. Favorite track: A Merry Payday Christmas.
more...
/
1.
02:16
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.

about

This festive Christmas album is packed with no less than seven seasonal hymns, written and produced by Overkill's own Simon Viklund and performed by the inimitable Pete Gold (aka Old Hoxton) known from the classic first person shooter "Payday The Heist" which some of you may have heard of.

THESE SONGS CONTAIN EXPLICIT LANGUAGE AND REFERENCES TO VIOLENCE.

credits

released December 19, 2013

Lead vocals on all tracks except track 8 by Pete Gold
Backing vocals on all tracks & lead vocals on track 8 by Simon Viklund
All music written by Simon Viklund except track 7 which is a traditional
All lyrics & dialog written by Simon Viklund
All live instruments performed by Simon Viklund
All production, programming and mixing by Simon Viklund
All rights reserved by Starbreeze Studios

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

OVERKILL Soundtracks Sweden

OVERKILL SOUNDTRACKS is the soundtrack department of game developer Overkill (a Starbreeze studio). We compile and publish the soundtracks connected to Overkill's and Starbreeze's games.

contact / help

Contact OVERKILL Soundtracks

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Track Name: A Merry Payday Christmas
So it's Christmas again
When break-ins isn't just what burglars do
Cause Santa Claus is in that business too
A Merry Payday Christmas to you!

So it's Christmas again
A season when even the thiefs are kind
And might just leave a little loot behind
A Merry Payday Christmas to you!

Merry Christmas to you
Everybody in our global crew
May your heists go as planned
Escape and get a spanking tan
Aw, let's do this

So it's Christmas again
Partners in crime will always have a blast
Robbing a bank all wearing Santa masks
A Merry Payday Christmas to you!

So it's Christmas again
Put jingle bells right on your getaway
And then imagine it's a Santa sleigh
A Merry Payday Christmas to you!

Merry Christmas to you
Everybody playing Payday 2
May your offshore account
Be filled with more than you can count
Aw, let's do this

The entire Christmas season
Is the payday of the year
May you get just what you wish for
Cross your fingers, then flip the card
And hope for something good

So it's Christmas again
See CrimeNet light up like a Christmas tree
Get ready for some honest larceny
A Merry Payday Christmas to you!
Track Name: A Heist Not Attempted Before
This is a story - I promise it's true
A tale of a crafty ol' robbery crew
They could clean any safe in a minute or two
They had hit every bank... and post office too

They had snatched every diamond and valuable gem
Seemed like nothing could offer a challenge to them
Then one Christmas they hatched a most brilliant score:
A plan for a heist... not attempted before

So they painted their guns white and learned how to ski
They got their disguise from a Christmas tree
Then they went to the North Pole as fast as could be
They were going to rob... Santa's toy factory

(My kind of crew - like taking candy from a baby!)

They traveled through blizzards for over a week
'Til they saw Santa's factory up on a peak
By the candy cane fence they then started to sneak
Seemed security there - was surprisingly weak

'Round the factory building came elves on the way
Bringing bags full of toys down to Santa's big sleigh
They were busy as bees but they froze at the sound
When our robbery crew... shouted "down on the ground!"

Then a plan as efficient as clockwork commenced
Where they melted away the elves' snowball defense
Then they hog tied the reindeers inside of their fence
And the helpers soon slept... thanks to gas in the vents

(Nice touch!)

They blew up the fuse box and turned on night vision
Then they utilized shape charges to get inside
They drilled through security doors with precision
Then manhandled Santa and had him tied

(Serves him right, big red fucker!)

Santa was tougher to crack than they thought
He just wouldn't surrender the code for the vault
Though they stepped on his glasses so he couldn't see
And an ice pick was used... to crack open his knee

(Good one!)

After water board torture and kicking his balls
After hours of smashing his face into walls
They finally realized just what did the trick
When they threatened cut off... Santa's beard, so thick

(You have got a dirty mind!)

So he gave up the code and they all gathered 'round
To find out just what treasures were there to be found
As the vault door swung open they realized why
A heist against Santa had never been tried
They looked in the vault and they all felt like rookies
See, inside there were just... lots of milk and cookies

(Aw, dear god - you fucking amateurs! Why d'you think no one's done it before? Dickheads...)
Track Name: If It Has to Be Christmas
It's Christmas
A time of joy and generosity
The season of good deeds and charity
We're inspired by the love and warmth we see

It's easy as one, two, three when it's Christmas
You send a heartfelt smile to someone strange
You give someone in need a little change
Oh, it's almost like rehearsed and prearranged
And I gotta say...

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're an asshole
If you think the season is the reason
You're a piece of shit
If someone has to dress up like Santa or you won't back a fund raise
Then you're a low-life fucking twat

It's Christmas
You spare a little change and make believe
Your conscience will be clear on Christmas Eve
Then you entertain yourself with gluttony
And shopping sprees

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're a son of a bitch
If you think compassion's just in fashion
You're a fucking nob
If it has to be New Year's for you to make a change for the better
You're a spineless fucking turd

Oh, you're so pleased with yourself
Fighting the good fight, one month out of twelve

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're an asshole
If you think the season is the reason
You're a wanker
If someone has to dress up like Santa or you won't back a fund raise
Then you're a fuck face

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're a bastard
If you think compassion's just in fashion
You're a fucking nob
If it has to be New Year's for you to make a change for the better
You're a spineless fucking turd

You're a spineless fucking turd

Make that fucking change
Track Name: I've Been a Bad Boy
I've been a bad boy this year
I'm not gonna get any Christmas gift
Santa's rules are very clear
I get a lump o' coal on the 25th
My stocking won't contain
No treat or candy cain
You see a bad boy, right here
Santa will skip me on this year's shift

Okay, listen now...

You'll get no trip to Spain
If you're crawling in the fast lane

No winter coat for you
If you piss beside the loo

Let's kick it up a notch, shall we?

Forget about that laptop case
If you drew a big dick on your sleeping friend's face

(Ain't that the truth?)

You'll get no bottle of wine
If you cheat when you play online

That's just wrong, and you know it you bastards!

I've been a bad boy this year
I'm not gonna get any Christmas gift
Santa's rules are very clear
I get a lump o' coal on the 25th
My stocking won't contain
No treat or candy cain
You see a bad boy, right here
Santa will skip me on this year's shift

Alright, hang on...

You won't get a rock guitar
If you robbed an armored car

You'll get no pajama dress
If you work for the IRS

Yeah, that escalated quickly, didn't it? Wait, it gets worse...

Forget about those poker decks
If you date your best friend's ex

And definitely no watch for you
If you ask a woman when she's due

...and it turns out she just... could use a little exercise...

All together now!

I've been a bad boy this year
I'm not gonna get any Christmas gift
Santa's rules are very clear
I get a lump o' coal on the 25th
My stocking won't contain
No treat or candy cain
You see a bad boy, right here
Santa will skip me on this year's shift
Santa will skip me on this year's shift
Santa will skip me on this year's shift
Track Name: Christmas in Prison
I can't recommend that you spend
Christmas in prison!

No jingle bells, just prison cells
It's Christmas in prison!

For a Christmas prank, you get Christmas shanked
It's Christmas in prison!

You don't get the kind of present you hoped for if you drop the soap on the floor
It's Christmas in prison!

Forget about that sleigh ride, 'cause you're sure to get parole denied
It's Christmas in prison!

You'll get no Christmas cards, instead you got your sadistic prison guards
It's Christmas in prison!

Instead of celebrating Jesus' birth, you get a cavity search
It's Christmas in prison!

None of those Christmas carols you sang, but you're sure to get beat up by a rival gang
It's Christmas in prison, Christmas in prison!

Instead of a nativity scene, you get shank in your spleen
It's Christmas in prison!

Instead of steaming hot mince pies, you get bleach poured in your eyes
It's Christmas in prison!

There's absolutely no celebration if you're locked in isolation
It's Christmas in prison!

I can't stand another minute here - I've gotta get out of here
It's Christmas in prison!
It's Christmas, Christmas in prison!
Track Name: Deck the Safe House
Christmas greetings from ol' Hoxton
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa
From a house with many locks on
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa

When the lockdown bells are ringing
Fa-la-laa, la-la-laa, laa, laa, laa
I cheer up my mood with singing
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa

(You gotta do summat)

Rumors say my crew replaced me
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa
That hurts more than guards that tase me
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa

But the switch has been debated
Fa-la-laa, la-la-laa, laa, laa, laa
Maybe I'll be reinstated
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa

(Fingers crossed, ey?)

I have heard of a petition
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa
To have me bailed out of prison
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa

That approach would be a pleasure
Fa-la-laa, la-la-laa, laa, laa, laa
But we need more drastic measures...
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa

(Got any ideas?)

So deck the safe house full of blue prints
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa
Bring a weapon of your choosing
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-laa, laa, laa

Time will come to quench our crime thirst
Fa-la-laa, la-la-laa, laa, laa, laa
You just have to break me out first
Fa-la-la-la-laa, la-fucking laaaa

(Thank you very much)
Track Name: Simon Viklund - If It Has to Be Christmas (American Version)
It's Christmas
A time of joy and generosity
The season of good deeds and charity
We're inspired by the love and warmth we see

It's easy as one, two, three when it's Christmas
You send a heartfelt smile to someone strange
You give someone in need a little change
Oh, it's almost like rehearsed and prearranged
And I gotta say...

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're an asshole
If you think the season is the reason
You're a piece of shit
If someone has to dress up like Santa or you won't back a fund raise
Then you're a low-life fucking dick

It's Christmas
You spare a little change and make believe
Your conscience will be clear on Christmas Eve
Then you entertain yourself with gluttony
And shopping sprees

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're a son of a bitch
If you think compassion's just in fashion
You're a fucking douche
If it has to be New Year's for you to make a change for the better
You're a spineless fucking turd

Oh, you're so pleased with yourself
Fighting the good fight, one month out of twelve

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're an asshole
If you think the season is the reason
You're a piece of shit
If someone has to dress up like Santa or you won't back a fund raise
Then you're a fuck face

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're a son of a bitch
If you think compassion's just in fashion
You're a fucking douche
If it has to be New Year's for you to make a change for the better
Then you're a spineless fucking turd

You're a spineless fucking turd

Make that fucking change